When he was delivered from this
annoyance by the Scotchman, who had been bred to surgery, he
looked about him wildly, exclaiming, 'Sure, the fellow won't be
such a rogue as to run clear away with my boots!' Our landlord,
having reconnoitered the shoes he had left, which, indeed, hardly
deserved that name, 'Pray (said he), Mr Birkin, wa'n't your boots
made of calf-skin?' 'Calf-skin or cow-skin (replied the other)
I'll find a slip of sheep-skin that will do his business -- I lost
twenty pounds by his farce which you persuaded me to buy -- I am
out of pocket five pounds by his damn'd ode; and now this pair of
boots, bran new, cost me thirty shillings, as per receipt -- But
this affair of the boots is felony -- transportation. -- I'll have
the dog indicted at the Old Bailey -- I will, Mr S-- I will be
reveng'd, even though I should lose my debt in consequence of his
conviction.'
Mr S-- said nothing at present, but accommodated him with a pair
of shoes; then ordered his servant to rub him down, and comfort
him with a glass of rum-punch, which seemed, in a great measure,
to cool the rage of his indignation. 'After all (said our
landlord) this is no more than a humbug in the way of wit, though
it deserves a more respectable epithet, when considered as an
effort of invention.
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