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Watts-Dunton, Theodore, 1832-1914

"Aylwin"

Had she been a boy, I could have borne it in a
defiant way; or had she been any other girl than this, my heart would
not have sunk as it now did when I thought of the gulf between her
and me. Down I sat upon a grave, and looked at her with a feeling
quite new to me.
This was a phase of cripplehood I had not contemplated. She soon left
the tower, and made her appearance at the church door again. After
locking it, which she did by thrusting a piece of stick through the
handle of the key, she came and stood over me. But I turned my eyes
away and gazed across the sea, and tried to deceive myself into
believing that the waves, and the gulls, and the sails dreaming on
the sky-line, and the curling clouds of smoke that came now and then
from a steamer passing Dullingham Point were interesting me deeply.
There was a remoteness about the little girl now, since I had seen
her unusual agility, and I was trying to harden my heart against her.
Loneliness I felt was best for me. She did not speak, but stood
looking at me. I turned my eyes round and saw that she was looking at
my crutches, which were lying beside me aslant the green hillock
where I sat.


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