The effect of this shock demented my father for a time. How it was
that he came to marry again I could never understand. During my
childhood he had, as far as I could see, no real sympathy with
anything save his own dreams. In after years I came to know the
truth. He was kind enough in disposition, but he looked upon us, his
children, as his second wife's property, his dreams as his own. Once
every year he used to go to Switzerland and stay there for several
weeks; and, as the object of these journeys was evidently to revisit
the old spots made sacred to him by reminiscences of his romantic
love for his first wife, it may he readily imagined that they were
not looked upon with any favour by my mother. She never accompanied
him on these occasions, nor would she let Frank do so--another proof
of the early partiality she showed for my brother. As I was of less
importance, my father (previous to my accident) used to take me, to
my intense delight and enjoyment; but during the period of my
lameness he went to Switzerland alone.
It was during one of my childish visits to Switzerland that I learnt
an important fact in connection with my father and his first
wife--the fact that since her death he had become a mystic and had
joined a certain sect of mystics founded by Lavater.
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