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Watts-Dunton, Theodore, 1832-1914

"Aylwin"

'
By this time my heart had settled down to a calmer throb, the
paradisal scent had become more supportable, and I grew master of
myself again. I was going towards her, when I stayed my steps, for
she was already making her way, entirely unconscious of my presence,
towards the boulder where I sat.
'I know what I will do.' I said; 'I will fling myself flat on the
sands behind the boulder and watch her. I will observe her without
being myself observed.'
I was in the mood when one tries sportfully to deceive one's self as
to the depth and intensity of the emotion within. Perhaps I would and
perhaps I would not speak to her at all that night; but if I did
speak, I would say and do what (on that day when I set out for
school) I had sworn to say and do.
So there I lay hidden by the boulder and watched her. She made the
circuit of each pool that lay across her path towards the
cliffs,--made it apparently for the childish enjoyment of balancing
herself on the stones and snapping her fingers at the dog, who looked
on with philosophic indifference at such a frivolous waste of force.


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