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Shaw, George Bernard, 1856-1950

"O'Flaherty V.C. : a recruiting pamphlet"

"
"There's a fallacy in your argument," they says.
O'FLAHERTY. A what?
MRS O'FLAHERTY. A fallacy: that's the word he said. I says to
him, "It's a Pharisee I'm thinking you mean, sir; but you can
keep your dirty money that your king grudges a poor old widow;
and please God the English will be bet yet for the deadly sin of
oppressing the poor"; and with that I shut the door in his face.
O'FLAHERTY [furious]. Do you tell me they knocked ten shillings
off you for my keep?
MRS O'FLAHERTY [soothing him]. No, darlint: they only knocked off
half a crown. I put up with it because I've got the old age
pension; and they know very well I'm only sixty-two; so I've the
better of them by half a crown a week anyhow.
O'FLAHERTY. It's a queer way of doing business. If they'd tell
you straight out what they was going to give you, you wouldn't
mind; but if there was twenty ways of telling the truth and only
one way of telling a lie, the Government would find it out. It's
in the nature of governments to tell lies.
Teresa Driscoll, a parlor maid, comes from the house,
TERESA.


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